Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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