We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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