It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize