Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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