Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."