do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
