Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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