My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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