it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
