so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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