did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
