he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
