People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
