So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
