Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
When are your genitals available?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
