return my video game
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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