girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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