my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Randomize
