Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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