Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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