Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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