Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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