Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
