guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
