awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
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