she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
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