On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
