He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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