The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
