i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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