Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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