I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
A+ Viking dick
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
