I hate your face
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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