Taylor Swift is so right about you.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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