I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
