Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
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