The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
The power of my boobs compel you
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
