blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
organizing the empties. That sober.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
