The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize