Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
