You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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