Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize