I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
