Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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