actually, I'm a sock model
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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