we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
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It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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