How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
