idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize