I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
