I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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